Blessings in Disguise

You ever been in a situation where you dont want to be in but realize once it began that you needed it, that God wanted you to be there. Well it has happened to me! This weekend is a long weekend because of Martin Luther King Jr day. I wanted to go back home and spend the weekend with my family but my mom refused to pick me up since it is a total of 5-6 hours for her to drive since my parents wont let me take a car to school. Well I was so mad at my parents for making me stay at Wingate when everyone else was going home. However because I stayed I got to hang out with my best friend who I believe I was drifting away from, which was making me very sad. We have spent the whole day together and I have realized that nothing has changed between us we are just busy so I will make more of an effort to spend time with her.

Also I have been having these weird and distrubing dreams which I will not go into detail with because it would not be good. When I woke up from these dreams I was inmensely confused because I knew I should not be having dreams like that. However looking back on these dreams it did not realize what I did in these dreams with someone the basis of the dream instead was that I am worth loving and that I am beautiful. I know that it was in some crazy weird way God telling me to have confidence in my self because someone will love me. I think it is also a sign to move on from the things that will never happen because if I remain fixated on what I soley want I could be missing out on something great. Now my something great has not come yet but I know when the time is right God will send me it to me. I just have to keep my options open and realize what I want sometimes is not in God's plans for me and that I should not ruin any relationships I have with anyone because of hopeless dreams. When you let yourself be open to new things, things you thought would never happen just might but I am no longer concerned with what ifs anymore because

I know that God has my back and that I am blessed even if i dont realize it half the time. Sometimes it takes something as staying at school on a long weekend or a strange unexplainable dream to remind us that God is giving us signs and we just have to look for them. Looking back on the past two weeks I can now see the signs God was trying to show me but I was to worked up on insignifcant things to see the message of God, so he caught my attention a differnt way. From now on I will be more open to the magnificant power and message God has for me in his plans. I will no longer be upset with the little things I can not control because God has a plan for me and I just have to learn to follow Him where ever He may lead me. Because God will catch me when I fall and He will always pick me up when I am at my lowest point. Its like the poem by Mary Stevens Footprints in the Sand. God is always with us even when we dont know about it.